Samui Wining & Dining
Tasty Dates

We highlight some of the more curious events of the month of March.


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1st –Pip this! This was the day, in 1989, that Lee Wheels mightily spat a single watermelon seed a distance of 68 feet and nine inches, at the World Watermelon Spitting Championships held at Luling, Texas. Sadly, judges later ruled he was using illegal custom seeds!

2nd – Divorce by cake. This was the uncomfortable plight of Chinaman, Cheng Yu, who filed for divorce on this day, in 2010, on the grounds that he was forced by his wife to eat cake for every meal. “I now feel sick if someone even mentions the word,” he told reporters.

3rd – Made to last – as Denver’s Joann Brusco realised when she came across the year-old remains of a ‘Happy Meal’, on this day, in 2009. The bread and fries had gone hard, everything had shrunk a little and it had taken on “a kind of acrylic sheen.”

4th – Despite long-running requests from loony English comedy character, Mr. Bean, Michael Jackson consistently refused to appear in a public ‘dance out’ with him. As a result, Rowan Atkinson made an animated 3D cartoon to depict the event on this day, in 2007, which can still be seen on YouTube!

5th –  This was the day, in 2010, on which scientists at Scotland’s University of Strathclyde patented an ‘intelligent’ indicator for pre-packed food. The built-in tab detected bacteria levels and changed colour when the contents were getting ‘ripe’.

6th – This was the day, just one year ago, when Florida authorities reported that 27-year-old Latreasa L. Goodman phoned 911 to report that her local McDonald’s was out of McNuggets. It seems she had paid at the counter but was then informed the restaurant had run out, and was refused a refund, as “all sales were final”!

7th – Celebrity chef, Emeril Lagasse, sent Cleveland’s 70 year-old Ellen Basinski a whole new set of his signature cookware, on this day, in 2010. It seems he had heard that the plucky senior had lost one of his trademark pans, taken away by the police as evidence, after she reported bashing an intruder with it in her home!

8th – This was the day, in 2006, on which Arizona animal rights activists were out in force. It seems that the Il Vinaio restaurant in Phoenix was selling lion burgers along with spicy homemade chips and corn on the cob, for $21 – but it wasn’t the price they were protesting about!

9th – New Bedford barber, William Camacho, is still arguing his innocence and claiming that his religious freedoms have been violated, after Massachusetts authorities shut his barbershop, on this day, in 2011. This occurred after evidence of animal sacrifices had been discovered.

10th – This was the day, in 2008, that a pig with only two front legs made the headlines in China. It had learned to walk balanced ‘on handstand’. Her owner has since been offered ‘a substantial amount’ for her by a national circus, but he’s not selling!

11th – Going back a bit, to 1878, this was the day when Scotsman Findlay McGregor took first prize in the Loch Garry ‘Bake for Pennies’ competition. His ‘Sprat, Potato and Gorse Pie’ (gorse!) seemed the perfect economy food.

12th – This was the day, in 1915, when Will Rolandson of the Brooklyn Dodgers made a splash. As a publicity stunt he attempted to catch a baseball dropped from one of ‘them noo-fangled airy-planes’. Sadly for him some joker in the plane decided to drop a grapefruit instead, resulting in the smug superstar being splattered from head to toe with pulp!

13th – Put a pie in your tank? This was the day, in 2011, when English scientists at the eco-friendly fuel firm, Greenergy, announced plans to power cars using discarded scraps of pasties and pies. The greasy refuse was being converted into bio-diesel fuel!

14th – The evidence was destroyed in a North Carolina robbery, after 17-year-old John Szwalla ate his ‘gun’, on this day, in 2009. He demanded money by pointing a concealed banana in his pocket, which he immediately scoffed when the police arrived.

15th – This was the day, in 2009, when police removed a three foot-long pet alligator from Alpine Wine and Liquors in New York. They issued tickets for ‘possession of an illegal animal’ and told the owners to get rid of it – and make it snappy!

16th – This was the day, in 1891, that Joseph Bazalgette died. He was the civil engineer who designed London’s main sewer system.

17th – To celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, a note of possible humour. An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman each order a Guinness and find a fly in their beer. Repulsed, the Englishman sends his drink back. The Scotsman flicks the fly out of his mug and begins drinking. The Irishman lifts his up by its wings and yells, “Spit it out! Spit it out!”

18th – Does the name ‘Bunny Hale and the Palace Theatre Orchestra’ ring any bells? This was the day, back in 1925, that ‘Tea For Two’ was first released.

19th – The New York Burger Co called in a catholic priest, a rabbi and a buddhist monk to exorcise their new franchise on West 23rd Street, just a year ago today. It seems that over the previous four years, no fewer than seven restaurants had opened there and rapidly failed. “We hope to get rid of the bad spirits and have a good vibe here,” said the new owner, Brice Moldovon.

20st – It’s the official First Day of Spring today, in England. And, not to be left out, the Americans have made it National Ravioli Day. Their National Days are getting ‘pasta’ joke.

21st – This was the day, in 2010, that workers from the New Zealand Arctic Heritage Trust began drilling through the ice to try to locate a case of Scotch whisky, which was recorded as lost by Shackleton’s unsuccessful 1909 expedition.

22nd – It was on this day, in 2010, that the city of Portland, Oregon, flushed away eight million gallons of city drinking water because a 21 year-old man had been caught urinating in the local reservoir. This moment of relief cost the local taxpayers $8,000.

23rd – The first-ever glass milk bottle appeared on this day, in 1880, made by The Express Dairy Company of Finchley, England. It came with a glass stopper that fell out if you turned the bottle upside down!

24th –Today is Våffeldagen (Waffle Day) in Sweden. It’s also ‘Titchborne Dole Day’ in Alresford, England. While the Swedes go waffling on, the descendents of Lady Mabella Titchborne still continue to dole out free cups of flour to the local peasants.

25th – This was the day, in 2008, that Herb Peterson, the originator of McDonald’s Egg McMuffin Breakfast Sandwich, passed away. Yes folks, they actually have people to invent these things!

26th – Robots appeared serving food at Dalu Robot Restaurant in Jinan, China, when they opened on this day, in 2010. There are six robot waitresses on duty, although – thank God! – the kitchen has real live people in it!

27th – This was the memorable day, in 1995, on which New Yorker, John Leonard, began legal action against PepsiCo. They had run a competition which offered ‘prizes for points’ and, just for fun, they included a Harrier Jump Jet for the unimaginable total of ten million points. Mr. Leonard actually collected this many points, and was not happy when Pepsi told him they were just kidding.

28th – If you like tom yam gung, freeze it first or this won’t work. Today is ‘National Something on a Stick Day’ in America (where else?)!

29th – The movie Hudson Hawk wins worst film at the 12th Golden Raspberry Awards, on this day, in 1992.

This was the day, in 1945, that Eric Clapton was born. One of the great rock legends, he first came to the public’s attention in the late ’60s fronting the supergroup, ‘Cream’.

 

31st – Today is ‘Clams on the Half Shell Day’ in America, ‘Potato Day’ in Benton, Kentucky, and also ‘World Bunsen Burner Day’. If you get it just right, you could put the spud on the half shell with the clam and cook it over the Bunsen burner. But then, that’s a bit silly, isn’t it?

 

Rob De Wet 

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